Wednesday, May 10, 2006

It's Aussie Appreciation Day

For no other reason than if I did not live in Texas, Australia would be next on the list of places I'd like to be..... especially now that it's approaching 90 here every day, and summer is still over a month away. So, how do you expect to talk with the locals if you don't understand what they're saying? Here's a little slang for your edification: Aussie Slang A few examples I liked: Slab: A carton of 24 bottles or cans of beer. Brown-eyed mullet: A turd in the sea (where you're swimming!) Bush oyster: Nasal mucus. Crack a fat: Get an erection. Figjam: "F*ck I'm Good; Just Ask Me". Nickname for people who have a high opinion of themselves. Kangaroos loose in the top paddock: Intellectually inadequate ("he's got kangaroos loose in the top paddock") Root: (verb and noun): Synonym for f*ck in nearly all its senses: "I feel rooted"; "this washing machine is rooted"; "(s)he's a good root". A very useful word in fairly polite company. Stubby: A 375ml. beer bottle. While Australia is home to bands like Men At Work, Midnight Oil, Silverchair, and Kylie and Dannii Minogue, I won't hold it against them. AC/DC, Nick Cave, The Church, (old) INXS, Jet, and Aussie Floyd, the Australian Pink Floyd tribute band, more than make up for the first few.

For the hell of it I'm also throwing in three pictures of my favorite Aussie babes. Cate Blanchett. Nicole Kidman. The picture above proves Tom has "issues" with his manhood. Elle Macpherson. She's had a child or two, and I'm sure she can look bad on some days...... But to be honest, I haven't seen that day.


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