Zelda Looks For Link(s)

1. I am getting old: Senior songs.

Take a look. If you can say: "Man, I remember when this one came out... and I heard it the other day on the adult contemporary station..." It's time to hang up the spandex, hair gel, and beer bong. (#2 Kinda not safe for work) 2. Sex ed for the media savvy kid. Peter the penis really needs to tone it down a bit. 3. Farts are funny, but not in confined spaces. Proudly made in America: A Poot pillow? I'm sure lots of people don't know about this product, but if I see you whip it out on a plane, and you're sitting next to me, I'm asking for a different seat. Going to the other extreme, we have Liquid Ass. Yes, I said liquid ass. Sounds like a drug from the 70s. And just so you know, it's not from the makers of Happy Fun Ball. I had no real reason to bring up Happy Fun Ball except I still find it funny.

I came across Liquid Ass and the poot pillow on the same day at different sites. They both claim to be proudly made in America. Why is it we can't make a car worth a crap (no pun intended) but we can make something called liquid ass, and another product that absorbs the smell (literally) of liquid ass? 4. Unfortunate name.What kind of last name is this anyway?

(#5 is safe for work) 5. I am frightened because of this video. Not just "that gives me shivers" frightened, but hiding under my bed frightened. Pre-op? Post-op? I don't know what's going on here, but the neighborhood dogs are howling.